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The choice of a live-in/out nanny is probably one of the most important character judgments that you will make.
Besides being in most every personal facet of your life, the lives of your dependent loved ones are placed in these hands. The following guidelines are basic parameters that are helpful in choosing the right person to join your domestic composition.
Firstly you need to specifically define what you need and want in this role. Do you need mostly part time child care and full time housekeeping--children in school full and/or part time? Full time child care--infants and toddlers? Spare part time child care---after full time school until you get home? What kind of time commitment do you need? At least one year, or one summer only? What responsibilities are going to be required of the nanny? Supervision, tutor, chauffeur to activities, meal time----cooking, teaching of manners? Be very clear on what is expected from this person, as well as what is not allowed. Examples of which would be spanking and other disciplinary tactics, and religious education, or commentary.
Granted, this situation is not static. It will always be a constant state of change, compromise, and rethinking of game plans. But if you narrow down the fundamentals, and keep the lines of communication open, it will prove to be a rewarding experience for everyone.
Assuming you already have a pile of applications, or notes from phone interviews, you are ready to begin sorting and sifting. The most important issue is that of language. Presuming that English is the preferred language, are you comfortable with broken English? Feel confident in that your instructions will be fully understood. Complete absorption of desired outcomes, and implications of insubordination are extremely imperative. Equally as important, your children will be with this person a great deal of time. They, too need to feel comfortable in the communication process. Directly correlated to feeling safe.
Another important criteria, although seemingly inconsequential, is whether or not the potential nanny has ever been away from home before. Those that have not even left for summer camp will be more likely to get homesick and not fulfill their time commitment.
A helpful tidbit of whether or not this person will fit into the family design is their birth order within their own family. This sounds a bit silly, but studies have shown that the oldest child is more of a caregiver than the youngest or only child. They tend to be care takers.
Inquire about their family situation. A close relationship is desirable in that they have good interactive skills within the family structure. Coming from a rough or distant situation has its pitfalls. Examples being: don't have inherent respect for the unit as a whole, and are more likely to exhibit clingy behavior. Assimilate you as their new family. Which in moderation is not entirely a bad thing. Key word: moderation. It is still a job, and lines of distinction will prevail.
And lastly we have certain personality traits to look for. An outgoing nature is better than shy for obvious reasons.
Active as opposed to couch potato, don't want your kids glued to the television. Ask the applicants what their favorite activities is---this is a subtle way to find out one way or other. If their answers are reading and watching movies, without any mention of bike riding, walking, swimming or the like, then you have your answer.
Somewhat correlated is whether or not they have hobbies. Personal interests and past times lends a sense of autonomy. I bring this up again as no one wants a stalker nanny. The clingy syndrome.
The points that have been presented, remember are mere guidelines. There are exceptions to every rule, as the steps one takes plays a large part in any behavior pattern. These guidelines coupled with your intuition should make this process easy. Good luck.
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